How do you know if your husband loves you truly and deeply?

Especially since I feel the same way.

How do I know my husband loves me? He moved into my ghetto shack where I had been paying the bills on my own for three years, and he turned his paycheck 100% over to me. He trusted me to handle our finances completely. I gave him weekly pocket money and I put gas in his car, but other than that we banked his entire paycheck while I continued to use my paycheck to pay the bills. Together we worked to reestablish our finances with the goal to secure a mortgage and move out of the ghetto.

I spent a lot of time dragging him kicking and screaming into adulthood: I had to teach him that we had a budget. Three dollars for a hot dog and a Big Gulp is okay; fifteen hot dogs and Big Gulps in a month fucks the books. Having never had to worry about a roof over his head or keeping the lights on, he tolerated little frustration and quit jobs at the drop of a hat. He seemed to think the gasoline tank was bottomless and that soap just magically appeared in the bath and dishes just magically disappeared out of the dishwasher.

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How do I know he loves me? He asked Mom to pay for nicotine patches and he quit smoking the cigarettes I refused to continue to buy. He stopped drinking cold-turkey and attended AA meetings and actually participated instead of just going through the motions. His Christmas gift from his parents was a computer textbook he asked for that he memorized and the price of the certification exam he took. With the new IT credential, he was able to sign up with technical temporary agencies and he worked shit jobs to gain experience and take advantage of free classes. Eventually he landed a full-time shit job in a warehouse wiping and refurbishing PCs for resale. He hated it and it was a toxic bullying environment but he kept at it because it was permanent with benefits. He petitioned to come home.

How do I know my husband loves me? He gave up being a wayward alcoholic spendthrift and cut ties with his overbearing mother to become a functional adult rather than lose me, we are the happiest we have ever been, and apparently he tells it to everyone we meet. Lol sometimes I picture him doing the Tom Cruise sofa bounce at Oprah’s. He worships me. I can’t ask for more than that.

We bought a home in Florida based on his salary alone and I became a full-time semi-retired housewife. How do I know my husband loves me? Despite my lack of employment, he is content to support me, continues to be hands-off about our finances, thanks me for handling the bills so he doesn’t have to worry about it, never bitches when I make a not-necessary discretionary purchase. When I complain and express my guilt over my new lack of financial independence, he reminds me that I supported him for years through his alcoholism and tells me my new shoes are cute. He never complains if I bring home another kitten, and agrees to pay massive veterinary bills rather than to more cheaply euthanize one of my precious babies.

What is the most offensive thing someone has ever asked you?

At the one-year mark the toxicity at work had escalated to threats of bodily harm. He phoned me in tears: what do you do when your bullies at work are your team lead, your supervisor, and your manager? But how do I know he loves me? He put up with it to prove to me he could keep a job. Horrified, I gave him permission to quit, and the owner of the warehouse wanted to know why he was leaving. Hey, Mr Bossman, how many layers of management do we have to go through with reports of harassment before we give up? Guy is lucky we couldn’t afford a lawyer to sue.

”Oh, you’re Mrs. Smith? Wow, your husband really loves you!” They shake my hand, tell me how lucky I am, then hold out the contract to explain so I can sign.

How do I know my husband loves me? He immediately went back to the temp agencies and didn’t miss a day of work. Eventually he landed a real IT job, working remotely. My Christmas gift to him that year was the key to my ghetto shack.

Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support. I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized. he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that. he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened. he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence. i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction. after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly. things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it. we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe … our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far? this has upset me so much its hard to even function.

How do I know my husband loves me? When the finances and circumstances said it was time to pull the trigger, my husband secured a realtor and a mortgage and a moving service while I was at work.

I had never seen this man so much as put a knife in a jar of peanut butter to make himself a sandwich. How do I know he loves me? He stepped up. For ten weeks he made scrambled eggs and mac ‘n cheese and frozen pizza, and reheated casseroles the relatives sent. He helped me dress and bathe and shampoo. He did the housework and kept up with my meds and fed the cats. He did everything I didn’t know he even knew how to do, and when he didn’t know, he wasn’t too proud to not ask questions.

I broke my arm not long after he moved in. I was completely incapacitated. The pain was enormous. I couldn’t roll over in the bed without help, much less dress, drive, go to work, wash dishes or cook or feed my cats. I discussed moving in with his mother temporarily so she could help. He wouldn’t hear of it.

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Anyone familiar with my other Quora content knows that I married a spoiled-rotten lazy unemployed only-child man-boy who more than filled my own co-dependency. My husband is in many ways someone I will have to take care of for the rest of my life, but since I had no intention of ever having children, dealing with a man who never cooked or paid a bill in his life didn’t seem too bad.

We lost the house to foreclosure and I moved out to a ghetto address I could afford on my own. He was dumbfounded when he learned he was not welcome to come with me. He moved in with his parents.

How do I know my husband loves me? He knows I’m sensitive about my weight, and when I’m feeling fat and ugly and insecure, he tells me how much he loves my ass. He brushes my hair and made me promise to never cut it. He tells me I’m beautiful every day. He notices if I’m wearing a different perfume. I get foot rubs every night.

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I said no. He’d proven to me a dozen times he was capable of charming his way through an interview to a job offer. He needed to show me he could keep a job.

Wow. This one is hard to verbalize. TLDR warning. But I will try:

How do I know he loves me? I’d told him that once he was employed and sober, he could come home. After about six weeks of living with his pathological mother, he realized that this wasn’t just Susan having another temper tantrum. He had no key to my house and he had to phone to arrange a visit that did not include an overnight stay. He realized that despite all the arguing and stress, living with me had been better than living with Mom, and that if he didn’t straighten up, I would eventually save up the price of a divorce lawyer. Susan ain’t playin’ this time.

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How do I know my husband loves me? Over the course of our 22-year marriage, my husband will occasionally meet a tradesperson before I do. Bank tellers, loan officers, rental agents, auto mechanics, insurance salesmen, lawn maintenance guys. I don’t know what my husband says to these people, but when I meet them, they say:

Then, the 2008 Great Recession. Through no fault of his own, he was laid off from the bank job we depended on to pay our mortgage. The banks were not hiring and after a year without even an interview, he officially gave up. Angry, depressed, in despair, the problem drinking became full-blown alcoholism.